"Limbo," denoted as "an uncertain period of awaiting a decision or resolution; an intermediate state or condition," sums up my recent (and be recent I guess I mean for the past month) state of mind towards my blog.
Though I am confident in my desire and passion for blogging, I find myself unable to post an update or an insight (into something that usually doesn't matter) because I feel like somewhere between becoming a college student, living in the midwest, and experiencing things that I'd never imagined, I've changed. Yes, it is inevitable. And yes, it only makes logical sense that as humans, we will continue to age and change both physically and mentally (brain plasticity ftw). But it scares me. Terrifies me. Never have I felt as much of a stranger to myself than I do now, but I know that some day I'll be able to pinpoint my finger on the exact "feeling/emotion" that I feel everytime I try to enter a new post, but even as I write this post---I am in limbo and only feel slightly comforted by the fact that I feel like I have a "deathgrip" grasp on the truest fundamentals of who I am. Let me be clear, this is less of a "midlife crisis: I have know idea who I am" and more of a "limbo: I realize that many things have changed and I do have a different perspective on certain things, but my innermost grasp on what I believe in, what is important to me, and my goals have not been lost." I just feel change. I feel limbo. (wow, highfives for anyone else reading this and thinking "that's a lot of epanorthosis")
So, I've had a lot of down time to ponder over what to eat, when I should get out of bed, and the meaning of life and sadly this is the only end product for the blog. I have however been considering the idea of starting anew, blogwise (curse nd gmail for finally upgrading and giving me the option to do so).
In other news, I survived my first semester at college (with only minor injuries and traumatic procrastinationoryism effects). Rather than trying to promise myself another "update blog" post (which I hate) I will leave you with a picture collage of the past 4 months of my life and ask you to fill in the story/gaps...appropriately.
Happy (and sweaty) family during frosh-O.
Chipotle: a hearty constant across the nation
Halloweekend 2010: best costume ever.
Good ol' Irish Football.
Moral of the story: never underestimate "raking leaves" in the midwest
Thanksgiving in Chicago/Northwestern University.
A familiar site, yet never a snowday.
Finals: a ploy to up sales for PeaceTea (that's a youtube video on photosynthesis btw).
Merry Christmas from Walsh Hall.
If you've made it this far, bravo. And cheers to Jenny on her journey to the rival-land of USC. May your first semester be filled with joy, bad food, good friends, sleepless nights, and everything else college has to offer (ps. don't die/get shot...are those mutually exclusive now?).
